What Kind of Parent Do You Want to be? Awesome or Average?
What a silly question, huh? But seriously… when your child is getting married and he or she is standing up to give a speech, do you want them to say, “Yeah, I had an okay dad” or “Yeah, my mom was all right” or do you want them to say, “Thanks Dad! You were the best dad ever!” or “Mom, you’re my very best friend and my inspiration for life!”
Which one do you want?
I think we would all say we want to be the best. Here at CCF, we arefascinated by the different dynamics of families. Something we are passionate about is parents rising up and becoming the best versions of themselves. Parents, are you ready to be proactive in your parenting?
In today’s podcast, we are going to talk about some key things every parent needs to do to become an awesome parent.
How to be Awesome: 101
A couple of years ago Don started fly fishing. It is hard. Don had never fished before much less done fly fishing. Let’s say he wanted to become a really good fly fisherman but he all did was buy a fly rod and drive out to the river. He didn’t get a guide, he didn’t watch a YouTube video, and he didn’t ask any of his friends who fly fish. He just went out there and fished.
What kind of results do you think he got?
A lot of parents approach parenting this way.We don’t know what we are doing and are afraid to ask.If we are honest, we have little to no idea how to parent on our own!
Well, this pattern stops here and now! Today, we are going to give you people to pursue. We believe people shape our lives and help make us into awesome parents.
How to be an awesome parent is not as much about what you do, but more about who you surround yourself with. You become who you are around!
First and foremost, you are called to pursue and be around Jesus a lot.We won’t get into all the reasons for this now, but remember the importance of daily time with Jesus. Put yourself around His word and watch how He transforms you.
Today we are talking about pursuing people.
Think about your parents. So many times, we choose to parent the way our parents did. Unless we completely disagreed with their parenting, we are prone to replicate it. So what do we do?
Step 1: Pursue the People in Front of Your Family
These are people who are ahead of you in the game.
Proverbs 11: 14 says, “Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counsellors there is safety.“
“Safety” stands out from this verse. Notice the verse does not saycounsel bringssuccess. It says safety. Surrounding yourself with parents who mentor, counsel, and help mold you provides assurance or confidence in your parenting. They provide a safe place for you to learn how to be an amazing parent.
When we were younger parents, we were like sponges. We would find parents further down the road from us and ask them all kinds of questions. We bugged them so much, but we were young and dumb and didn’t care. We just wanted to learn how to raise our kids before it was too late!
Bottom Line: Find families in front of you and be developed by them!
This is how CCF was birthed. We wanted to make it easier for parents to have someone in front of them.It started with teaching small groups and helping people see the value of family investment. We now usetechnology to help us expand our reach.
We designed our Basecamp membership site to be interactive and flexible. We wanted to replicate what we received from the people who went in front of us.
When we met with parents ahead of us, we might talk to them for hours. Often times we took only one or two things away and did our best to apply them immediately.
This is why we focus on short lessons. We love to cut to the chase and give you practical things in 15 minutes or less.
Who are the people you can pursue?
Be the parents who pursue others for your family. Don’t wait for someone to come to you. Reach your hand out and ask them for help. Ask to walk in their footsteps and see what they say! This connection creates the exchange of wisdom from their family to yours.
Pursing people in front of you is super important. Relationships are key. There is something about hanging around the right people to help you learn what parenting is all about.
Surround yourself with people who are passionate about parenting! It will stir your heart to be a great parent too!
Pursue people in front of us. CCF wants to be those people for you! Through our book, podcasts, and Basecamp membership we are doing our best to grab your hand and help you on this journey of parenting. We deeply want to give you what we have learned along the way!
Bottom Line: Let us be people in front of you!
Step 2: Pursue the People Moving with Your Family
Like minded friends that have the same values
Small group at church
Similar season of life
We strongly recommend you get involved in a local church. Church has been a huge part of our family’s life. Our local church birthed this ministry with us. The local church is the best place to find people to help move with your family.
The enemy wants to isolate you but God wants you to live in community.
Ecclesiastes 4:12 says,“Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”
Bottom Line: The more you weave yourself in with other people, the less likely your family is to be broken.
You are more likely to know what is going on with your kids
You have community to talk to when things go wrong
You don’t feel like you are failing when hard seasons come
Moms don’t feel lonely when they are home alone with small kids when they have each other
Surrounding yourself with like-minded families creates a level of connection and energy! Doing life together creates healing for families in the hardest of seasons.
We have friends from our young parenting days that we still connect with even though we have since gone separate ways. We did life together with them intensely for about a decade and it helped get us through the early years.
Look for people around the same age
Kids with similar ages
Go on dates with the parents and laugh
Find a church that you can be grounded in
We tell our kids, “It is easier to stand alone when you have someone to stand with.”When you build this kind of community, you give your kids someone to stand with.
Bottom Line: It is cool to do the right thing in a like-minded community.
Doing life together with families like yours is so valuable!
When we pursue people, we become an awesome parent AND person! We start becoming the person God wants us to be!
We are launching another round of Basecamp!
What is Basecamp?
The tried-and-tested online resource for parents who crave connection with their kids + want to build a family who loves Jesus (& each other) without yelling, controlling, or sending anyone to a time-out!