REPLAY! Creating Independent Kids

How To Connect With Your Spouse During The Holidays


We are so excited to do a quick throw back to a podcast we did last March! This week we are gearing up for the school year and we found a “oldie but a goodie” we think every parent, grandparent, and future parent needs to hear!

Buckle up and get ready to challenge your thinking when it comes to how to cultivate independence in your home this year! 

And the winner of the “helicopter parent” award goes to…,” said no one ever.

No parent dreams of doing chores for their children when they’re grown and out of the house. But by avoiding the important goal of teaching your children to be self-sufficient, you might be setting yourself up for just that.

In this week’s podcast, we discuss the topic of moving your child from dependence on parents to self-sufficiency.

Our goal as parents is to raise independent, self-sufficient, contributing members of society that will one day advance God’s kingdom here on earth in a mighty way.

Self-sufficient can be defined as taking care of one’s own needs without external assistance.

What if we told you that you’ve already trained them in self-sufficiency in so many areas? The day they were born, they started their journey of not being as dependent on you, even though a newborn is the most dependent of all. (She is no longer living in momma’s body. Step one, right?)

5 Ways to Create Independence:

  1. Give Responsibilities: Assign chores and empower them to keep up with their own belongings
  2. Identify Opportunities for Ownership: Take care of pets and their own space
  3. Teach Life Skills: Doing laundry, collecting trash, etc
  4. Create an Independent Environment (Systems): Place for shoes or backpacks, routines in place for lunch-time and  homework
  5. Teach Problem-Solving Skills: Ask them how they would fix, help, or solve a problem

Crazy Cool Quotes

  • Don’t believe the lie that if you don’t do certain things for your kids, then you’re not a good parent.
  • If we’re fearful and always doing things for our kids, we’re going to create kids that are always dependent on us.
  • Let your kids live their life, let them experience their own failures and successes without you doing it all for them.
  • Now is the time to start training self-sufficiency. We don’t want to still be doing their laundry or paying their bills long after they’ve moved out.
  • Let them not succeed at the level we would want them to succeed at times because it’s their journey.
  • It’s okay to let your kids make mistakes. It’s how they’ll learn from them.
  • You have a choice if you are going to empower your child with responsibilities or do things for them. The more you do for them the more dependent on you they become.
  • Parents, you have to be patient, bite your tongue, take a step back, and let them make mistakes.

If you are thinking this sounds amazing but there is no way your kids can do these things, I challenge you to believe differently. Check out the chore chart we created! I think you will be surprised and encouraged at what they can do.

Your job as a parent gets easier with each step of independence you give your kids. And society will be so pleased that you have raised a contributing member that will someday take care of others as well as themselves!

If you have any questions about teaching self-sufficiency, email us at [email protected]. We’d love to hear from you!

Go be crazy! The school year is coming and we believe in you!
How To Connect With Your Spouse During The Holidays

If you have a question or a parenting issue that you’d like us to discuss in a future podcast, email us at [email protected].

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