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“Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.”
NIV 4:6 Ephesians
I’ve heard this verse so often but never looked up the meaning of the word “exasperate.” As a father I am not supposed to do this to my children so maybe it would be a good idea to know what the word means.
Exasperation happens when we annoy someone to the point of frustration, impatience or irritation. Wow! So I can do things — and ideally I should avoid these things — that can actually bring out wrong behavior in my kids?
That’s what exasperation is. It means my behavior is bringing out the worst in my family. And what’s crazy about it is I usually have good intentions. I am frustrated because I want them to do something right or well, but my frustrations just make the situation worse.
What can you do to not be an exasperating parent? Here’s a couple of ideas:
1. Speak life even when you correct. “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” Ephesians 4:29. Our anger certainly exasperates our children.
2. Treat your kids as you want to be treated. What exasperates you? Chances are those same things exasperate your children.
The opposite of exasperation is given in the rest of the verse. “Instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” When we don’t exasperate our children, we open up their hearts to receive God’s ways in their lives.
