One thing we talk about here at CCF is building strong relationships. One of the best ways to do that is by seeking to understand before you discipline or correct. This seems impossible in the moment because we are trying to get things done or trying to stop a mess from happening. Reality is that when we jump in and say “no” before understanding the big picture, we end up doing more harm than good.
We end up damaging the relationship instead of building it up.
What do we do about this? How do we fix it?
Let us help! Three ways to understand your kids better...
-Slow down & think before you react
-Try and get inside their minds
-Value their desires
Instead of just jumping the gun and saying no... just pause and think. Ask yourself the question “how can I build up this relational line instead of damaging it?” Then we parent from a place of peace instead of stress.
Next ask yourself the questions “what is my child thinking right now?” “why are they acting the way they are or doing the thing they are doing?” You might not know the answer every time but as their parents and the one who knows them best you have unique insight into their minds. You will be surprised how you know them better than you think.
Lastly, value their plans and desires. This does not mean give into every whim, instead them be kids! Let them make mistakes and messes sometimes. This small gesture will help your child believe in themselves and trust you.
How can you seek to understand your child today?
