Creating Hard-hearted Children
“Then the Lord said to him, “Now then, you Pharisees clean the outside of the cup and dish, but inside you are full of greed and wickedness. You foolish people! Did not the one who made the outside make the inside also? But now as for what is inside you—be generous to the poor, and everything will be clean for you. “Woe to you Pharisees, because you give God a tenth of your mint, rue and all other kinds of garden herbs, but you neglect justice and the love of God. You should have practiced the latter without leaving the former undone.”’ Luke 11:39-42
Is your child hard-hearted? Do they resist your instruction? Do they argue and get angry when you ask them to do simple things? Are they resentful when they don’t get their way?
What if we are helping to make them hard-hearted? I know it’s not intentional, but what if our interactions with our children are unknowingly to us creating resentment and resistance in their hearts?
In Luke 11 as Jesus talks to the Pharisees, He gives us some ways those in authority (that’s us, parents) create hard hearts in those under our authority.
- We focus on looking good on the outside and neglect our hearts. Verse 39: “Then the Lord said to him, “Now then, you Pharisees clean the outside of the cup and dish, but inside you are full of greed and wickedness.”
- We focus too much on their behavior and not enough on what is going on inside their hearts. Verse 42: “Woe to you Pharisees, because you give God a tenth of your mint, rue and all other kinds of garden herbs, but you neglect justice and the love of God. You should have practiced the latter without leaving the former undone.
Jesus is clear that those who focus on the outside too much miss the point. It’s not that we don’t focus on the outside — “practice the latter without neglecting the former” — but when we focus too much on the outside, we create hard hearts in those under our care.
A simple thing to try today. When you interact with your children today, inside your heart ask the Lord to reveal to you what is going on inside their hearts. Ask them questions about what is going on in their heart.
Jesus recommended to the Pharisees less rules and more love. I think he recommends the same to us as parents.
