The other day I was working in my yard to remove some photinia bushes that had died. They were also covered in some thorny vines, and as I cut everything down, I got a thorn in my finger. I thought my finger was hurting because the thorn had simply punctured the skin, but in a couple of days I noticed the wound would not heal because part of the thorn was still left in my finger. Once I removed the thorn, it was amazing how much better my finger was by the next day.
The same is true in relationships. Sometimes we have thorns in our relationships that need to be removed. And like me with my thorn, sometimes we don’t even know they are there.
How do we find the thorns so we can remove them? We watch how our family members are responding to us.
Are they withdrawn?
Are they irritated with us?
Are they giving us one-word answers?
Is their countenance negative?
If so, we don’t attack. We ask. “Have I done something to offend you?”
We find the thorn so we can remove it. How do we remove it? We ask forgiveness. We don’t defend ourselves. We don’t justify our behavior. We own our part of the issue and seek forgiveness.
“I’m sorry I offended you. Will you please forgive me?”
And the thorn is dislodged. The next day the relationship seems different. It is healing.
See the thorns. Remove them through your forgiveness. Watch relationships heal.
